Not too long ago I went to my favorite spot in the NoDa (North Davidson) area to work on my brand.
I paused briefly to approach someone who had caught my eye, unbeknownst to me that the young woman had a wife, standing several feet from her. They immediately noticed the Inner Reign logo on my hoodie and t-shirt (available for purchase in the “SHOP” section of the menu) and became the first people to asked: “So, is that your brand?”.
We all talked about each other’s business ventures, the difficulties of chasing your passion while not getting bogged down with school or work, poetry, writing books, etc.
We get to the part where I give my elevator speech as to why Inner Reign was created, which was to be a place where men (and women seeking to better understand said men), could seek relatable content as we all go through this crazy journey called life, a realm where like-minded individuals feel at peace, exchange ideas, and understood the plight we face in this society, as we seek to become high value.
I go into my elevator speech stating, “Our scope of knowledge is limited to what our parents teach us, and our experiences as we venture out on our own. Men are behind the eight ball at birth, and we have a finite time to make an impact in this world, and find our purpose.”
The young woman’s wife smiled, and just when I thought I was going to hear the “men have it easy speech” she stated, “I think you’re really doing a good thing. We need a voice that speaks to our men, our pharaohs, our kings, because men have it hard. The role to be providers, there is so much pent-up emotion that society won’t let them explore because of the ideal of what we believe the male figure should be”.
I was floored. She was absolutely correct, but I never thought I would ever hear a woman say that. The creation of this content is my vent, designed to engender a revolution of the male in modern society.
There is a mask the male must wear, in the eyes of the public. I struggle just like the rest of you, I would never ask for help, because that’s not what men were taught to do. We suffer in silence, never wanting to inconvenience, binding our time, turning our pain into the power needed to dictate life on our own terms. . . .to become kings.
That’s exactly why Inner Reign is here . . .
The Mission Comes FIRST
The first thirty years of my life, I can honestly say, my biggest regret, has been the importance I have placed on the agenda of other people, women in particular.
From kindergarten, to grade school, to college, dating, and in marriage, I had never put myself first. I was balancing the agendas of everyone else. Family, Friends, Girlfriends, Spouse.
I grew SICK of it.
Even when you get sick of it, when you break ties with all those things, it was still a habit even after the fact.
When I first discovered game, I went out constantly, putting myself as a man on the line, to be judged on my game and value from our female counterparts; there is a certain rush to it, especially when you are a person like me who, for the most part of their lives, hasn’t had much luck when it came to women in the upper echelon of the gene pool from a physical perspective.
The danger of being consumed into game so deeply is that you ended up putting yourself in places you necessarily don’t care for, for the sake of pulling the 8-9-Dime of your dreams. Clubs, lounges, and bars, were not necessarily places I care to go to have fun, and I don’t say that because I’m getting older, I genuinely don’t care for those places, even when I was younger I didn’t care to go out like that. I would approach the baddest chicks in the venue, and then if things didn’t go well for me that night, I’d be standing there, awkward, unhappy, ready to go home. Women have all the power in night game, still subject to their agenda.
I did some research as to how I could turn that feeling around, I listened to YouTube videos from Tyler (Real Social Dynamics RSDTyler) and Kain Carter’s (hotdamnirock) channel, and they both had interesting views on the subject of “looking for women”, both varying in the style of message but both pretty much stating the same thing.
Tyler on the subject of game stated that, there comes a shift in a man’s mind where he has to focus on his objectives, what he sets out to do, and along the way, you put yourself in high volume settings, where you run into women.
Kain, more bluntly, stated, “I don’t set out to FIND women, I MEET women, doing things I’d normally be doing anyway. Ain’t nobody looking for these h*es”.
That’s when the light bulb went off. These were men that found their purpose, and everything else became secondary.
When you don’t put your mission first, you place yourself in position for others to maneuver you as they please. Their agenda becomes primary, not yours.
A man needs to focus on harnessing his gifts, and talents to the best of his abilities, to make his impact felt. To become the high value man, he ought to be. Finding what it is, he is passionate about, and pursuing that dream, and working on his craft to create the realm he wants.
The mission is the main course, anything else is dessert.
When I was in grade school. I finished 42nd in my class as a senior, my freshman year I slacked off; too focused on women
When I was in college, I coasted on the physical talents I had during my football career, but didn’t truly perfect my craft; too focused on women
No goals in sight after graduation from college; met a woman, and instead of finding my purpose and drive, I was too busy furthering what she wanted; too focused on women
It is moments like that, when you look back at age 30 and you’re like, what did I do with my life? Why am I where I am? Why have I underachieved? Shouldn’t I be further along than where I am?
The mission didn’t come first. . .
Since I have started to openly have conversations with men about the subject of “game”, I get asked the question. “How do I deal with rejection?
I laugh because when I look at what I’ve been through, on the brink of losing everything because I tried to give so much of myself to people who didn’t give a damn . . who cares about losing someone? Who cares about rejection?
There is a difference when you are rejected while on your mission, and rejected when you are simply trying to find women.
Let me give you some examples:
- A friend of mine and I are out at a lounge, I approach the baddest thing in the room, I run my standard game, end with suggesting us getting a drink some other time outside of the lounge, she tells me I must buy her a drink tonight first. HA HA. No. I go back to my friend, disappointed, while she chooses her pick of the litter in front of me. I am rejected trying to FIND someone.
- I am in NoDa, working on marketing strategies, planning, creating content, trying to further my brand, I stop and I see something I want to approach. I approach, I run my standard game, and at the end she tells me “mmmmm I’ll think about it”, which is pretty much the same thing our mothers told us, when we asked for something and they KNEW they weren’t going to give it to us. I go back to business plans, smiling, chasing the bag, wondering what loser she will end up with.
See the difference?
My focus is on the final objective, the end goal, the MISSION AT HAND.
We all want to be liked and loved, and desired, and cherished. No one understands that better than I, believe me.
However, I envision a generation of men that doesn’t just complain about their situation, they act.
A generation that once an idea is contemplated, is brought to fruition
A generation that chases its dream relentlessly, with no regrets.
No more “what ifs”
No more “I wish I tried harder”
High value men dictate the terms
It starts with the MISSION COMING FIRST . . . above anything else.
Weather Your Storm, Maintain Inner Reign -E