When Titles Became Meaningless

A common topic discussed in Inner Reign revolves around the landscape of dating.

A significant portion of this blog’s existence has been spent helping men realize their worth, in a dystopia that currently under values them, including within the realm of relationships.

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When the prospect of a relationship comes up, women often bring up the advantages to them, for not entering the “confines” of tying yourself to another.

“There’s too much pressure that comes with a title”

“I can always fall back on us not being committed to each other”

“Why buy the cow, when I can get the milk for free?”

“I can receive the benefits of a man, without having to give him anything”

Oh. How Lovely.

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Yes. These are actual responses that stuck out to me during conversations with women, and while these could be valid, I have always looked at these statements as cop outs.  Is it most likely due to trusting someone who ultimately broke their heart? Probably. But we’ve all been on the wrong end of a relationship, this is no excuse.

These were the benefits people use to develop an aversion to relationships, that for a while, I desperately fought to change the surrounding narrative.

But today I want to present a different theory to the table.

**Ahem**

I don’t believe titles have ANYTHING to do with whether or not a person commits.

I don’t believe titles should be viewed as a “magic switch” that makes people do what they are supposed to do.

Best believe, a person who isn’t shit to begin with, won’t be concerned about the “pressures” that come with a title.

Titles became meaningless the moment we started using them as an out. . .but in actuality. . .

Women behave and respond appropriately, to whom they want.  Regardless of the title attached.

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Let me share some personal stories.

I dated a beautiful younger woman from the islands last year for a few months.

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The relationship was good for the most part: she was ambitious, had her own car, own place, held multiple jobs, and didn’t mind paying for dinners or outings; however, when it came to the physical, it was a struggle. The connection wasn’t there for whatever reason and after a couple fights, we broke up.

A year or so later, I reached out. . . but she had a boyfriend. We reconnected, went on a few dates, shared some close moments again, but ultimately. . . fell out for the same reason as before: A chance to bond on a more physical level doesn’t occur.

Now my question to you, the reader is this: What’s the difference in our interaction between having a title and not having a title?

NOTHING.

Literally, NO DIFFERENCE.

I was good enough to go on dates whether I was her man or someone else was.

But guess what?! When it came to being affectionate, I wasn’t good enough for that on a consistent basis, for whatever reason.

Title didn’t make her do anything. . .  because title has no bearing on anything.

Another example.

There was someone I was friends with and dated for years, and I probably put this woman through every hell you can think of in a relationship.

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I won’t make any excuses for it but, I broke up and got back with her multiple times, made her feel like she was not worthy, and even attempted to cheat on her.

Despite the dark points in our history, and her having every reason to not even breathe in my direction, she has been my help when I needed it the most, even when I’m prideful and wouldn’t dare ask anyone.

I don’t like to make my problems, other people’s problems

But when there were times when I was in a tough bind, if I needed tires for my car, advice or someone to talk to. . . she was there.

WITH NO TITLE ATTACHED.

So again, I ask. Where was the difference between having a title and not having one?

Did the persons behavior change?

No. No difference.

It’s just connection, bond, chemistry. . .and more importantly, the effort.

Every girl just wants her Superman in the above areas. . .

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A person must WANT TO do right by you. Title or No Title.

Conclusion

There was a quote from the SAW franchise that always stuck out in my mind.

“If you’re good at anticipating the human mind, it leaves nothing to chance”

This is ABSOLUTELY correct.

Despite how different we all claim to be, human beings are human beings.

We have mastered the art of subterfuge.

We will use any excuse in the world to deflect the fact that we aren’t interested in someone, or our agenda simply differs from the one showing interest.

With the “pressure of the title” being number one on that list.

It’s possible the world would be in a better place if we could just be honest.

Honest with ourselves.

Honest with the people we interact with and encounter daily.

Therefore, being High Value entails developing an ability to recognize patterns and red flags the moment we see them.

Contrary to popular belief, people aren’t very good at hiding who they REALLY are.

You just have to pay attention.

Recognize when a person truly wants to be in your presence because they want to be there.

Title or not.

It will show.

Weather Your Storm, Maintain Inner Reign -E

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