My girlfriend and I were texting one afternoon, when she happened to come across this post on Facebook.
The young woman posting this status seemed to be irate because African-American women are not heralded for their efforts, when it comes to unconditional love.
My girlfriend pointed out the disturbing and negative picture that this post paints, for both black men and women; that black men are dysfunctional in multiple facets of life and black women pretty much just sit there and take it.
It’s an overarching generalization to say the least, but specifically in regard to the relationship setting, I was asked to give my thoughts on her portrayal of “unconditional love.”
Ladies and Gentlemen this is not unconditional love.
Women and men that behave in this manner are nothing more than gluttons for punishment.
There is no double standard, simply because what a person chooses to accept is their choice.
What You Accept Becomes Your Standard.
One of the most important aspects of being High Value Men and Women is accountability.
Own the standards you create and hold yourself accountable for the consequences that stem from those standards.
The hope being that High Value individuals find other High Value individuals that meet each other’s guidelines, and set an example for what great relationships look like.
This is the path of progression; to a better society where relationship and community means something again.
One of the largest hurdles I had to overcome was learning to stop wasting my time and my prospective partner’s time, when I KNEW they weren’t the one.
That’s when you leave yourself open to mistakes.
I married someone who I ignored the red flags on.
It cost me a divorce, severed ties with family, child support, and not being able to see my son as I please.
On lonely lights I picked up the phone and called old flings for quick fixes.
It cost me my peace of mind, worrying about pregnancy scares, robbing me of time, money, energy and focus.
It’s not worth it.
DEAD THAT SHIT the moment you realize the person across from you isn’t a viable piece to your happiness.
I was watching a video from Transformation Church, where the leading preacher Pastor Mike, said something so profound.
Pastor Mike: “You know when the best time to fire somebody is?”
Eric: ?? ??
Pastor Mike: “Before you hire them.”
Once I had figured out what I liked and didn’t like, I was firing people at times within 30 minutes of texting.
And I slept like a baby every night.
Yes, it can be hard waiting until the right person comes; however, you must decide in your mind that your peace is paramount.
Peace in your singleness is way better than the eventual disaster that comes from settling.
Circling back to the post.
The root of the issue is this: This post discourages people with standards, while having sympathy for people who accept ANYTHING.
No. Sorry. Not buying it.
Of course, a High Value man isn’t going to stay with a woman who doesn’t provide, in my opinion, baseline level efforts to the relationship (loyalty, sex, employment, etc.).
Just like I wouldn’t expect a High Value woman to put up with anything less.
The same woman you meet the first 60-90 days will more than likely be the same woman when you put a ring on it.
A woman is either a wife when you meet her, or she isn’t, and vice versa.
STOP ACCEPTING BULLSHIT.
Weather Your Storm, Maintain Inner Reign -E